16 February 2013

Post number 50

I just hit post number 500 at my other blog.

I hesitate to post here because my feelings about God are generally not very positive.

No one understands God, of course.  Reportedly God has revealed himself to us thru the Bible, and so everything we "need to know" is there.  Which leaves religion big, small, and in between, confusing, frustrating, harsh, blind, and with tons of different theological approaches.  The Bible is quite confusing, as well.  God is a god of vengeance  of war, of peace, of love, of justice, of harshness.  

Quite honestly, i do not believe that God interferes in our lives much at all, at least not on a physical plane.  I don't believe that God caused this person not to leave on time so that they are not in a car accident but they never know it.  BECAUSE if you believe that, then you have to believe the opposite and that God chose/caused the accidents that do happen.  It drives me to madness to hear people say, "Well, God must have a plan in all of that."  

In the same manner, prayer has me quite confused.  For as much as prayer seems to resolve anything, i might as well walk in tight circles in my bedroom and say that it helps.  I really, really do not "get it."

Now, i can see that everything, everything is a miracle.  

I do believe that there are numerous times each and every day that we each miss death by minutes or even seconds.  I do believe that God promises that all things will work out to his glory ultimately.  I do believe that prayer helps align us to the will of God - whatever that is.  Or changes our hearts somehow.  But do not expect me to believe that God causes every tiny thing or has it all planned in detail.  And if you tell me, "It must be part of God's plan," don't be surprised to hear me scream.

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Wife, wanted to be a mama - not going to happen, massage therapist, child of God. I can be emailed at: 4Kat2009@gmail.com