05 June 2010

Shock is rather numbing

The reality of what was said set in a bit later for me.  


We have been ex-communicated.  So i looked it up to see what it means, & also tried to find it in a Lutheran context.  The only person i've ever known to be ex-communicated before (& until then i didn't know it was still done) was guilty of egregious behavior.  As far as i know, the only thing we did was to visit other churches (in part because of the unbelievable claims made from the pulpit of how no other churches are honoring Jesus anymore).  I would like this explained to me.


Duane didn't like some of what G preached, but it didn't eat at him as it did me.  However, he has not taken this well.  Meaning that while he didn't have a problem with this church before, he does indeed now.  


While i have no desire to have my membership "saved," i very much would like to have the justification for this explained to me.  Truthfully, if this is G's whim with no church (doctrine) history but the elders back him, that moves the status of this congregation from "church" to "cult" in my book.  



So, i had thought of trying to get an explanation out of G, since he said he will be preaching this on Sunday.  But i don't think that is the best way to go.  As he mentioned bringing the elders into the conversation, i think drafting a letter to him with copies to the elders is probably wise.  Again, this is not to "save" my membership, but in the interest of fairness.  And if the elders back his decision, i will be shocked to learn i've been a member of a cult for the past 3 years.   





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10 comments:

Amrita said...

Although I may not fully comprehend your church situation I sympathize with Diuane and you
May the Lord klead you to a spirit filled church

yvonne said...

Whew! My sympathies! This sounds remarkably similar to a small conservative church I attended for some years. I asked for my membership to be terminated when I had a difficult time with the preaching. It did feel too close to a cult. It's been 15 years since then. I too pray that the Lord will lead you to a spirit filled church.

Amrita said...

The word ex-communication is very cruel and sounds medivial. Just visiting other churches and expressing your opinion openly does not deserve this treament.

I think G suffers from an inferiority complex.

I would be very hurt indeed.

Jessica Renshaw said...

Beloved friends,

This whole situation breaks my heart and must break Jesus'. To think that a shepherd would be such a stumbling-block to his sheep that he must shut people out who are earnestly seeking God instead of welcoming them in to discuss their doubts and concerns! He seems, as you say, Kathryn, to be rigid because of his own insecurity.

I really appreciate this blog of yours. There is such transparency and such honesty!

I hope you will be able to maintain friendships with some of the church members and if the pastor discusses you in the service tomorrow, whether by name or not, and you hear of it, I hope you will have your shields of faith up so no fiery darts get through to your hearts. I hope too that what he says will not become gossip or back-biting, either among the members or on your part.

I pray instead that whatever results from it will accomplish God's purpose for that church, that it will break wide open anything that needs to be aired and cleaned out, cause healthy dialogue and ultimately bring glory to Him.

He may have chosen you two for such a time as this, even if you are not directly part of that dialogue, to bring His light and truth into that church. There may be others, more than you think, who feel exactly as you do.

We love you. Let's "do" lunch or dinner next time you are in O.C.

Mrs. Mac said...

Hoping you find His Peace in this ordeal ... and wondering how many others might have the same thoughts as you only afraid to express them. May the Lord lead you to a healthy church. Hugs,

Celeste said...

oh how horrible...that is why I think that God loves us all without having to be under the thumb or threats of any pastor or father.. regardless of the organized faith.

you are a wonderful God loving person and wanting to explore your love for our creater is NO SIN!
God loves you!

Kathryn said...

Ah, dear friends, thank you for your support.

Amrita, thank you. We do find the idea of ex-communication rather extreme & medieval. That word was never used by the Pastor, BTW. He simply said we no longer are allowed to receive communion there, but by definition that is ex-communication. I'm sure that God has a place for us, even if it isn't just one church.

Yvonne, thanks for stopping by. I fear that something like this happens much of the time. I think people are often too cowed by the "authority" of the church & follow what the church dictates, regardless of the rightness of it.

Jes, oh dear friend, thank you for your listening ear! While we are hurt & shocked, my concern is where this well-meaning but rigid shepherd will lead those sheep. I continue to pray much. (Thank you for your compliment, tho i have to admit, i often don't understand when folks talk about me being "transparent" or "honest." I'm just relating our experience - with the knowledge in mind that i'm biased!)

I so appreciate your words: I pray instead that whatever results from it will accomplish God's purpose for that church, that it will break wide open anything that needs to be aired and cleaned out, cause healthy dialogue and ultimately bring glory to Him. This is my prayer, too.

Mrs. Mac - i think there must be others bothered, but not expressing their dis-ease. We have some folks who used to attend at least a couple of times a year & whom i've not seen for a long, long time now. I think perhaps that G offended them with some of his manipulation & they had no desire to return. I am hoping that, as Jes said, this will refresh the church & i have peace in that. It may very well not happen, however, if the church decides to remain in their rigid, conventional state.

Curly M! How good to see you! :) I think that what we have as churches now is a far cry from what really honors God. There are good churches, but even good churches get caught up in drama & politics, & those things do not honor him. Still, we feel we need to have connection with other Christians, & a church setting is the best place for that to happen. We've met lots of wonderful people.

Thank you for your kind words. :)

Jena Webber said...

Sounds like a cult to me--I think you hit the nail on the head when you figured it out. Leaving a cult-like environment can take some time, but you are getting out the easy way--having been booted out.

Sorry for the pain that it is causing you, though. Sounds like more drama than you negotiated for when you first started going.

Unknown said...

Excommunicated for visiting other churches? Weird. Very very weird. I think it sounds like visiting other churches might be just the thing to do. Hmmmm... So sorry for the trouble. You must feel so confused about how to even feel.
Love,
Lynnette

Kathryn said...

O. Mommy - it has some of the traits of a cult. We looked it up. What is hard is that we know that this pastor REALLY loves Jesus & is seeking to lead the people in that direction.

I've heard things there that have bothered me & i thought he was moving off point, but i just keep reminding myself of how G loves Jesus. But, especially in the past couple of weeks we have been hearing things that are not scriptural & we cannot support.

This church wants to honor God, i know it does, & not become the cult of G, so we are praying for them very much.

Lynnette - yes, weird, weird, weird. The head elder had never even heard of this before & went back to the constitution of the church to check it out. We are praying that this will help pull the church back on track.

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